much as i love it, austin's always been artificial--it was this fun place where my brother and sister followed me down from east texas for college, and where i would spend eleven years of my life, but it was never supposed to be where my mother would end up.
* * * * *
when we were kids, she'd come in after a long day at work with her arms full of groceries and ask our slack, lazy asses sprawled in front of the tv what we wanted for dinner. we'd usually each come up with something different, and more often than not she'd accommodate us by whipping up three different meals with seemingly effortless ease, all served steaming hot at the same time. we naturally took this shit for granted.
this year as always, she promised to cook for christmas-eve dinner the full, traditional thanksgiving spread i rarely make it home for anymore. i'm a little concerned when i get in on the 22nd and realize that she hasn't yet commenced the usual preparations, and when the 23rd passes without much progress i wonder if maybe she's no longer up to the challenge.
i needn't have worried--by the time i rouse my ass outta bed on christmas eve, she'd been up for hours cooking and it was all done to perfection, complete with three different pies for dessert.
* * * * *
all my drunken good intentions to look up old friends went--just like the last trip, and the one before that--by the wayside; instead, shackled by the enforced sobriety necessitated by family proximity, i reverted to my normal shut-down self and stuck close to home and hearth for the duration of my time in austin.
it was ok--we had a good time.
* * * * *
watching some ironic i-hate-my-family holiday special, my mother snorts and says to no one in particular, "hell, i'd lay down across a railroad track if i could spend another christmas with my mother and daddy."if life follows its natural order, i imagine one of these days i'll say pretty much the same thing.
sober update: good god, and to think alcohol used to cheer me up.
5 comments:
Well, if your family relations have any consistent storyline, it has been your mother's devotion to her children. She has pretty much lived her life for and perhaps through you all.
That is a burden to live up to. Arguably not as big a burden as Tiger Woods (or Andre Agassi or Serena Williams, or just about any other great athlete who started at a young age), but a burden nonetheless.
Merry Christmas.
confuzzled - you were here, in town, and we didn't meet?
lame.
happy new year, my friend.
noblesavage: yeah, but unlike many devoted mothers, she doesn't have even a trace of the martyr in her--there's no guilt or baggage to deal with (except my own, of course).
judi: darlin', after two years of reading this blog, you know i don't meet people. but if that ever changes, you're high on the list.
not sure who's more selfish, you or me.
i've wanted you to show me *your* austin, and i wanted to show you the amazing things that have been done to the houses off Oltorf and 35 (Travis Heights?).
:::sigh:::
judi: one of these days i'll get well, and we'll party.
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