why? because i wanted that goddam playstation

.
so this year, i entered the firm's "describe your most memorable holiday" essay contest.  out of ten entrants i came in fourth, behind two secretaries and a word processor.

it's true--blogging success is transferable to real life.

christopher hitchens, 1949 - 2011

.

I sympathize afresh with the mighty Voltaire, who, when badgered on his deathbed and urged to renounce the devil, murmured that this was no time to be making enemies.

and what does your generation have to offer that's any better, you smarmy, post-ironic twentysomething loser?

.

not that i'm really that worked up about this, but i figure it's never too early to start rehearsing my indignation for the day when the above snot-nosed punk and thirty million of his closest friends try to take away my medicare ten years from now.

a rare populist rant

.
if, like most americans overwhelmed by the complexity of our current financial crisis, you know the banks pulled some really shady shit but can't quite put your finger on what exactly it was they did, allow me to present for your delectation a little bank fraud to which everybody can relate.

consider the situation of one veronica gutierrez:

veronica, like many americans living paycheck-to-paycheck, was watching every penny.  yet, as careful as (i'm sure) she was, it was inevitable that one day she'd fuck up.

hey, we've all been there, right?  i can easily imagine veronica kicking herself when that check came back, knowing it was gonna cost her $22 she didn't have to spare.

what i can't so easily imagine is how veronica must've felt when she got her statement at the end of that month:

confused?  lemme help you out:  apparently, the good folks who ran one of the richest, most powerful banks in the country were so desperate for every last penny that they developed an algorithm which re-ordered the transactions of their poorest [and, presumably, dumbest] customers in such a way as to maximize the overdraft fees they could extort from them.

was veronica amused? not in the least; nor were the attorneys who made her the lead plaintiff in their class action.

everything i've ever said on this blog about frivolous lawsuits and/or outsized jury awards aside, screw the $66 wells fargo thought they owed veronica--i hope the bitch got $66 fucking million outta the $203 million the jury awarded in the case.  and then punitive damages on top of that.

*     *     *     *     *

of course, we all know that's not the way it played out; veronica and her co-plaintiffs probably each got next to nothing, while their attorneys all became multi-millionaires, if they weren't already.


bankers, lawyers--whatever, they're all motherfuckers.

reason #427 why mkf is beloved throughout the blogosphere

.
with all that's going on in the world, there were weighty matters i was intending to address on this, the first night i've permitted myself alcohol in over a week.  but, for better or worse, i chose to warm up with a little blog-surfing first.


as for what follows, what can i say--in guttermoralityland, the opportunity for a satisfying drunk-comment trumps current events every time.

and will i be appreciated for saving this kid at least two years of expensive therapy?  hell, no--i'm just a lonely voice in the goddam wilderness, goddammit.

[for those who care, the above was provoked by this post and follow-up.]

people keep asking me what i think about OWS

.

in 2000 [i could go back further, but whatever], america elevated a guy to the presidency for no better reason than because he was amiably redolent of the guy it had voted out in 1992.

in 2008, america elevated a guy to the presidency for no better reason than because his flashing white teeth promised hope and a change from the last guy america had elevated to the presidency.

in 2010, america allowed its midterm elections to be swayed by a fringe group of conservatives who, sensing something was seriously wrong, screamed for limited government but woulda cut your nuts off had you dared threaten their medicare or social security.

in 2011, sensing even more is wrong than the last guys, this would seem to be the best that our best and brightest can come up with:

 *     *     *     *     *

in 1776, any sixteen-year-old american entering college was expected to be conversant in latin and greek, and prepared to develop a thorough mastery of logic and argumentation--what we call "critical thinking" today. furthermore, theology was a mainstay of education back then, providing a foundation of [gasp] ethics.

i keep waiting for some modern incarnation of washington, madison and/or jefferson to rise up and lead america outta the wilderness in which it finds itself today.

needless to say, i keep being disappointed.

*     *     *     *     *

in 2006, a guy i respect advised me to cash-out everything i own, convert it all to gold in a singapore bank, follow him to chile and renounce my american citizenship before the shit hit the fan.


he's laughing at me now, and i can hardly blame him.

mkf discovers fire

.

couple weeks ago in austin, i met up with an old architecture-school buddy who, unlike me, stayed with the profession, and who over the course of a few premium margaritas

whipped up by an equally-premium lil' bartender who couldn't stop talking about how helplessly drunk he got whenever he imbibed tequila, all the while casting significant glances my way (and yeah, he got a big tip)

filled me in on the current state of the art.

while i probably pull down far more coin in my glorified "want fries with that?" job than does said friend in the highly technical and specialized position he's so painstakingly built for himself over the last 20+ years [and for which sorry state of affairs feel free to blame the profession of architecture rather than my lazy, underachieving ass, ok?], our conversation still made me think.

and i mean long and hard--about what i'd walked away from all those years ago, and why.

to the point that when i got home, i set myself to googlin'--and while in my waning twilight years i'll probably never have the time, money, knowledge base and/or attention span necessary to master the current professional standard, i figured i might as well take a shot at google's low-rent alternative.

so i downloaded it.


two weeks ago:

my first model--i was so proud it turned out just like the one in the tutorial that i saved it.


last night:

point of this post:  if 3D modeling software had existed back when mkf first contemplated abandoning architecture, the world might be very different today (ok, maybe only mkf's world, but whatever).

as for the half-finished kitchen above (not to mention the rest of the goddam house):  more to come.