Saturday, February 23, 2008

the great thing about limited readership is that you can post shit like this

so today i find out that a week ago my little brother gave up almost two-thirds of the blood in his body via his asshole before his wife managed to get him to the hospital, and then several inches of his colon shortly thereafter.

what does it say about me, my relationship with my brother--hell, our whole fucked-up family--that i know that tomorrow i'll have to take two vicodin [for you novices: two vicodin = all the fuzzy warmth imparted by ten ounces of alcohol with none of the slur] half an hour before i can even begin to bring myself to pick up the goddam phone to call his hospital room and tell him i'm glad he's still alive?

[that was a rhetorical question, btw]

update: turns out i exaggerated--i was able to do it on one.

6 comments:

Anonymous said...

Two vicodin to call him?

Why don't you just say you hate him? It would sound a lot easier and appears to fit the facts. I mean, I don't know anything about this relationship other than the two paragraphs you have written, but it is not unusual to hate other family members -- siblings and parents not to mention those distant third cousins.

What is difficult, however, is that society generally frowns upon us expressing contempt for "family" members. We are supposed to love them and people are horrified when you express anything but warm fuzzy feelings even when you have NOTHING in common with people you are biologically related to.

So, cut to the chase guttermorality. Just admit you have a great deal of loathing and contempt for this younger brother and be honest to yourself and others why.

I have found it enormously refreshing and freeing when I have done it concerning members of my own family. And I stop making pretenses that we are all just getting along fine.

If other folks in the family can't handle that, well, then, I am sure you can slip them a Vicodin or two to help out.

Anonymous said...

Your brother is still your brother . You don't need to hang out with him but you should express gladness that he's alive . There is a level of honesty that you should indeed engage in . If you're going to tease us with your discomfort around him , you should tell us the gripping and dramatic story as to why . Would be great fun , don't you think ?

Anonymous said...

First, I hope your brother is ok.

Second, is this really you?!?! I want proof!

If it is... Oooooh! I knew you'd finally start a blog!

LMB said...

Wait...you have a blog??!!

mkf said...

preaching: i don't hate him, this is about me (see subsequent post)

byzantine boy: i dunno that i'm ready to drag members of my family into this thing--at least, not the living ones

atari and luis: yeah, i'm now officially dangerous. and i figure the two of you owe me, oh i dunno, at least 8 or 9 drunken, presumptious and offensive comments each.

Anonymous said...

OOH! Fun!

=D

Seriously, I'm intrigued, or something. I expect full frontal bluntness.